One of my favorite movies is “Mr. Holland’s Opus”. Mr. Holland, played by Richard Dreyfuss, is a struggling song writer who takes a teaching job as a “fall back” option, because nothing else is working. He is talented as a teacher, but doesn’t know it, yet. His principal, Olympia Dukakis, sees something in him no one else does, and takes a chance on him. He’s miserable,and  not teaching well because he doesn’t feel like he’s supposed to be there, just on and on. At one point in the film, someone (can’t remember who) confronts Mr. Holland about his less-than-stellar efforts. He says to them, “I’m doing the best I can!” and they respond with, “Your best isn’t good enough”.

Your best isn’t good enough.

Those words linger in the air.
Heavy. Crushing. Oppressive — Like a hot summer day.

Because. . .sometimes, your best isn’t good enough. Sometimes you try hard, but you fall short. It’s not that you want to, it just happens. Maybe you’re just not careful. Maybe you really are trying your best. Maybe you’re not really trying. Maybe some days you’re trying your best.

Some days, my best is pretty good.
Some days, it’s pretty bad.

Some days, I can recover. Recognizing my mistakes and moving forward to amend them.
Then some days, I’m reminded that my best simply isn’t good enough.

But that doesn’t mean I need to give up. It doesn’t mean that life as I know it is over. (Though, admittedly, it feels that way when I get caught up in it). I keep learning. I keep growing. Only when I stop growing or recognizing that I don’t have all the answers will my best truly be not good enough.